If you are at home and are threatened or attacked:

• Get out, if you can
• If you cannot get out, try to go to a lower risk area of the house
• Get to a room with a phone or carry a mobile with you
• Try to avoid going into high-risk places like the kitchen and garage where there are potential weapons
• Try to avoid rooms with small areas like closets or crawl-spaces where you can be trapped. You may be able to stay away from rooms without windows
• Try to alert your friends, family, or a neighbour that you’re in trouble and need help
• Call the Gardaí 999/112 when you can. Call our  24hr National Freephone Helpline on 1800 91 91 91

If you are still living with your abuser, consider ways to increase safety for you and your children.  For example:

• If possible, tell someone you trust about what is happening.  They can check in to see if you are safe
• If possible, keep a phone in a room that locks from the inside and try to memorise and/or save emergency numbers
• Carry a mobile phone at all times
• Decide where you will go if you do leave home (even if you do not think you will need to)
• Make up a code word to let the children, friends, family, or a neighbour know that you are in trouble and need help
• If it is safe to do so, keep a handbag/overnight bag with important phone numbers and items in a place where you can grab it if you need to leave in a hurry

If you are preparing to leave your home or have to leave unexpectedly, thinking through your plans will help you feel more in control.

Decide on your destination and the timing of your departure.

• Memorize or save emergency contact numbers.
• If possible, open a savings account in your own name to ensure access to funds when you leave.
• Leave money, spare keys, copies of important documents, and clothes with a trusted person.
• Identify friends or family who can provide you and your children with a place to stay or financial assistance if needed.
• If your children are old enough to understand, consider informing them that you might have to leave home in the future, but stress the importance of keeping this information secret.

If you choose to inform your children, you can:

• Reassure them by explaining that you have a plan to protect them.
• Emphasize the importance of following your instructions when it’s time to leave.
• Plan and teach them an escape route.
• Agree on a code word that signals it’s time to leave immediately.

If you decide not to inform your children, try to have their belongings ready for when you leave

Do not worry if you cannot take anything with you, the most important thing is getting to safety.  You can always arrange to get access to important papers and belongings later.

However, if you do have time to prepare, try to take as many items listed below as appropriate:

• Money
• Clothing
• Identification (driver’s license, passport, birth certificates for yourself and your children)
• Medication
• Credit and debit cards
• Keys to your car, home, and office
• Important numbers
• Sentimental items such as photos or favourite books, children’s favourite toys or blankets
• Important documents such as:
  • Any documents relating to the abuse (police reports or court orders)
  • Health insurance information
  • Social welfare documentation
  • School and medical records
  • Welfare ID or work permits
  • Housing documents such as a lease, deed, or mortgage payment statements
  • Financial records
  • Marriage license
  • Custody papers
  • Immigration papers

Ending an abusive relationship does not always mean the abuse will stop. Many women continue to face abuse from ex-partners, so it is important to take steps to ensure your safety. Consider the following actions:

• Consult Your Local Domestic Violence Service: Discuss post-separation safety planning.
• Seek Advice from the Gardaí: Ask for home security recommendations.
• Enhance Home Security: Depending on the risk level, consider changing locks, adding window locks, and installing CCTV.
• Install Automatic Lights: Place lights at the front and back doors that activate when someone approaches.
• Plan Escape Routes: Think about possible ways to exit your home quickly if needed.
• Inform the Gardaí: Let them know about any court orders you have in place.
• Cancel Shared Financial Accounts: Terminate any shared credit or debit cards.
• Open a New Bank Account: Ensure it is in your name only.
• Change Online Passwords: Update passwords for all your online accounts, including social media.

If you are being abused or stalked by your ex-partner:

• Change Your Phone Number: Screen calls using voicemail or block harassing numbers. Save any threatening messages or those that violate a domestic violence order.
• Alter Your Routine: Avoid places and routines that your ex-partner knows. Change routes, types of transport, or arrange for rides for regular appointments or errands.
• Meet in Public: If you must meet your ex-partner, do so in a public place.
• Prepare Your Children: Teach them what to do if they see the abuser.
• Inform Teachers and Childminders: Ensure they know who is authorised to pick up your children and that they do not share your contact information.
• Notify Your Employer: Make them aware of your situation and arrange for protective measures, such as not going to lunch alone, having a colleague accompany you to your car or bus stop, and providing your employer with a photo of the abuser in case of a workplace confrontation.
• Document Incidents: Keep a record of all incidents of abuse and harassment, noting the time, date, and any damage done. Take photos of any damage or injuries.
• Report Abuse: Notify your local Gardaí station of any abusive incidents.